Holiday Traditions: 20 Questions to Ask Your Family
Holidays and family get-togethers are where traditions get made. The recipe everyone knows by heart, the chair that’s always Grandpa’s, the games after the meal. But where did they come from, and how have they changed over the years?
Whether you light a menorah, a diya, or a tree, celebrate Eid, Lunar New Year, Kwanzaa, Passover, or Nowruz, or just gather for a big dinner, these questions will get the stories flowing.
One tradition in my family is the shrimp casserole that was typically made on Christmas Eve. Even though it was made with canned ingredients like creamed corn and cream of mushroom soup, it was a considered a special treat to my father's family. They were living at or near the poverty level during those times, so this was an elevated dish.
Why Traditions Matter for Family History
A holiday dish can point to the region your ancestors came from. A blessing in another language can hint at a migration. A tradition that suddenly stopped can mark a move, a marriage, or a hard year.
These are clues, and they’re often the only ones that never made it into a census record. The people who remember them won’t be around forever, so ask now.
How to Use These Questions
Download and print them or share them with a QR code
Ask them at the table, on a video call, or in a group text
Pick one person to take notes or record audio
Try one question per gathering if 20 feels like a lot
Ask the oldest relatives first. Their answers are the ones that disappear.
20 Holiday Tradition Questions
Favorite Holiday: Which holiday did you look forward to most as a child, and why?
The Oldest Tradition: What is the oldest holiday tradition in our family that you know of? Who started it?
Origins: Do you know where a particular tradition came from, such as a country, a region, or a particular ancestor?
The Table: What dish always showed up on the holiday table? Who made it, and do we still have the recipe?
Lost Recipes: Is there a holiday food you remember that nobody makes anymore?
Preparation: What did getting ready look like? Cleaning, cooking, fasting, shopping, decorating?
Special Objects: Is there a menorah, prayer book, lantern, ornament, tablecloth, or other item that gets used every year? What’s its story?
Songs, Prayers, and Blessings: What songs, prayers, or blessings did your family say or sing? In what language?
Language: Are there holiday words or phrases that came from another language and got passed down?
Clothing: Did your family dress a certain way for the holiday? New clothes, special outfits, head coverings?
Who Hosted: Who always hosted, and how did that role get passed along?
The Kids’ Table: What was the job of the youngest person in the room? Who asked the questions, found the afikomen, or lit the first light?
Gifts and Giving: How did your family give? Gifts, money, food, charity?
Moving Across Borders: Did a tradition change when your family moved to a new country or town? What was kept, and what was dropped?
Blended Traditions: Did your family mix traditions through marriage, conversion, or neighbors? How did that go?
Hard Years: Do you remember a holiday during a hard time, like a war, a move, or a loss? How did the family handle it?
Holidays Away From Home: Did anyone celebrate in an unusual place, such as the military, a hospital, or on the road? What was it like?
Neighbors and Community: Who outside the family took part? A church, a synagogue, a mosque, a temple, a neighbor?
The Funny Stories: What’s the funniest holiday disaster in family lore? The burned dish, the wrong date, the uninvited guest?
Passing It On: Which tradition do you most want to see continue, and who should carry it forward?
Download the handout here:
Share with others via QR Code
Found something surprising in the answers, like a name, a place, or a story that doesn’t match the records? That’s where DNA can help. Reach out and we’ll dig in together.
Comments